Theories and the Family

 


What is a theory? In simplest terms, a theory is an explanation for a recurring phenomenon. An example of a theory is that love is the dominant emotion in life, therefore, people will get married simply because they love each other. One of the biggest theories in the world of marriage and family is the Family Systems Theory

What is the Family Systems Theory? The family systems theory is that one must look at the family as one whole functioning unit with interrelated parts that work in a systematic way. The concept of the Family Systems Theory is incredibly important for therapists to keep in mind, as it recognizes the family as a whole rather than a collection of individuals. Every person in the family has an influence on each other. 

A family theory that falls under the Family Systems Theory is the Exchange Theory. The Exchange Theory explains that in many family situations, there is the constant tension of “you owe me one”. Picture this: a mother is constantly cleaning her home and nurturing the children. In exchange, her husband provides for the family and takes the kids out at times to allow her to have a moment to herself. This couple has exchanged certain duties and roles in their family. They might also exchange some roles with their children, such as simple household roles like helping with the dishes or setting the table. 

There are also the Conflict and Symbolic Interaction theories which fall under the Family System theory. These theories explain how interactions and dealing with conflicts in families have a huge influence on how healthy the family unit is and how successfully it functions. A family that encounters conflict with defensiveness and accusations will tend to constantly be at war with each other or be very secretive towards each other in order to avoid accusations. On the other hand, a family that encounters conflict with a desire to understand and to make peace, the family will tend to invite more family discussions, closeness, comfortability within the household.


These theories help scientists, therapists, and a copious amount of other individuals come to understand how the family functions together. They operate like a feedback loop- a process that loops the output of an interaction back towards the input. There are positive and negative feedback loops. A positive feedback loop encourages an action to continue, like a parent rewarding a child for making their bed without being asked. This would likely encourage the child to continue to make their bed without having to be asked. A negative loop discourages a certain behavior, such as a parent having a heart-to-heart with their child about why it is important that they don't stick plastic beads up their nose or in their ears. This feedback hopefully discourages the child from continuing that behavior (but make sure to make it clear that it is not simply just the plastic beads that shouldn't be put up their nose, otherwise they might resort to crayons).

In summation, the family functions most successfully when it works as a whole. As a single unit, with multiple parts helping each other succeed and grow in ways that inspire healthy familiar progress. A family will not be healthy if it is simply a collection of individuals raising themselves and growing on their own. A healthy family REQUIRES togetherness, closeness, love, and willing assistance.

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